It would seem there is a certain degree of awkwardness and lack of communication when it comes to the topic of S-E-X.
Americans talk openly about religion, politics, sports, raising kids, parenting, books, movies, eating, traveling, tweeting “Selfie’s” and Facebook, but it appears we tend to always avoid discussing our personal attitudes and opinions about sex.
The messages we receive as kids from our caregivers about SEX…are sometimes responsible for this awkwardness, not always, but the odds are greater that SEX was, and is, still considered TABOO!
I still remember the day when my Mother explained to my brother’s about the difference between “Friday Girls,” and “Sunday Girls!” I chuckled when I heard this and was curious to know about “Saturday Girls?” In an unassuming way, I asked my mother…”what about Saturday Girls?” She quickly gave me that “LOOK,” and then shushed me so she could continue the conversation that “Friday Girls” were not the kind of girls to bring home, but “Sunday Girls” were acceptable to date and not to mention…worthy of her introduction! Needless to say, times have changed and so have the “labels!”
In my practice, we talk about “healthy, consensual SEX.” Individuals and couples often have questions and concerns about the quality and quantity of sex they are having in their relationship. My education and post-graduate work with the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapist’s (AASECT), has provided me with specific education and training, relative to intimacy, sexual health, sexual dysfunctions associated with arousal, desire, orgasm and pain…as well as, sexual compulsions/addictions, fetishes, kink and more.
Healthy consensual sex applies to all kinds of partnered relationships, and sexual identities. Communication is KEY when discussing sexual needs, desires and boundaries. It takes a great deal of courage to allow ourselves to be vulnerable with the ones we love. More importantly, creating and maintaining a healthy, intimate sex life is worth talking about with someone who has the specific education and training to help YOU and YOUR PARTNER create the love you want.
Let me help you and your partner, TALK ABOUT SEX so you can have the passion and intimacy you both crave…without all the awkwardness!
In Good Health,
~Joanie Fink-Arney, MS, PLMHP, NCC
j28 Relationship Therapy, LLC